Uncivilised!

Long winded rant…!!

My helper took her off day yesterday. I had initially allowed her to take Sundays off (once a month) but due to my recent discovery on her lifestyle, I decided to scrap that. I will have a separate juicy post on that.

Anyway, yesterday afternoon I decided to bring Ryan out to United Square. It was my first time out with Ryan alone. I was a little hesitant at first but I bite my tongue and went ahead as planned. I was so determined to get hold of a watering pot for him. Die die must go. That’s me. Always so kan cheong. Unfortunately luck was not on our end. I searched the whole complex and found nothing appropriate.

So I went to do some groceries shopping at Cold Storage instead. Ryan behaved really well, very cooperative all along. After my groceries spree, we stopped by for some kiddie rides and playground fun. We saw a Japanese girl from afar, around the age of 4+ running around, disturbing and blocking other kids from going up the slides. What a spoilt brat!

Not surprisngly she did the same to Ryan. When Ryan was going up the stairs on the slides, she purposely pushed Ryan away and sat right in front of his path. When Ryan was sliding down, she walked up from the bottom of the slide and refused to budge leaving Ryan stucked in the middle. Such a nuisance endangering the life of others and herself.

As much as I was very unhappy at the sight, I told Ryan to be patient and suggested he play with other activities. He was visibly disappointed but was well mannered enough to give in for other activities – ‘wheel twisting’. That Japanese girl continued her antics while her mommy just stood there like a tree, not moving an inch.

How could a playground fun be complete without going down the slides right. Simply irresistable but Ryan simply could not enjoy any spur moment of fun without getting interrupted. From her expression, she finds joy in upsetting others. Another mommy was so afraid of letting her 18 mo girl near her and decided to just sit aside.

I was upset with the girl, but I was more disappointed with her mother for not making an effort to manage the whole situation; her kid. Kids being kids, they can be rough and I could totally understand that but that doesn’t mean the parents/guardian could keep a blind eye on their actions. A few times she almost pushed Ryan down the slides because she was impatient. Ryan kept saying ‘excuse me, excuse me’ only to have his plea fallen on deaf ears. I can see other frustrated mommies were already exchanging glances.  One hand I was telling Ryan to ‘share and take turns’, afterall this is a public amenities but deep down I so want to confront her mom telling her to at least manage her daughter! Anyway, I did not. I swallowed my frustration and continued keeping a close eye on Ryan. Don’t want to create a scene ma….

The final straw came when Ryan was at the ‘twist the wheel’ section again. This girl came and pushed Ryan away. Ryan looked at me and I again said ‘let’s share’ (I was boiling mad by then). This girl was so inconsiderate and possessive that she doesn’t even allowed Ryan to put his hands on the wheel. By then I could not take it anymore. I walked up to the girl, told her politely ’Girl, please share with your friend, okay?‘. She ignored me and pushed Ryan right under my nose. Wahhh… I cannot tolerate further. I was soooo soooo mad. I held on her hand and firmly said ‘NO.. no pushing, you’re hurting your friend here.. please share‘ then I took a glance at her mommy and summoned her to look after her girl and not allowing her to hurt other children. Guess what. She treated me like an invisible air. I don’t know whether she understands me or not. She stared at me blankly. I could explode anytime. By then, Ryan’s patience reaches its limit. He insisted playing and the girl continued to push him away. Ryan started crying. Poor boy. I quickly pulled Ryan away, said  ‘PLEASE BEHAVE‘ and showed the NO sign language to both mother and daughter. I was dumfounded to see the mother unperturbed. I assume she doesn’t understand English but seeing your child bullying her peers, anyone with the right state of mind would have acted sanely right? It was as if nothing has happened despite seeing a boy crying because of her daughter’s action. Disappointed! 

Ryan was inconsolable. He was deeply upset. So I brought him to the wheel. I just couldn’t be bothered to give face to anyone anymore when they showed no respect to us at the first place. A mother’s got to do what a mother’s got to do. The girl also started crying upon seeing Ryan at the wheels. I really don’t care. I was prepared for a cat fight even if mother finally speaks and confront me. But guess what.. she showed no emotions, nothing and then poooofffff…. after awhile mother and daughter were out of sight. No apology at all. Speaking of uncivilised manners….. ^*%(&*^

16 thoughts on “Uncivilised!”

  1. Hai~ I encounter that all the time and many of the parents instead of blaming their kids they blame yours!

    So, whenever I see something like that I will asked Darrius to leave even if he protest. Making him cry is better than letting others make him cry as it can be more traumatic.

  2. You know what’s in my mind when I finish reading this post? That woman is not her mother! maybe just a care taker … a normal mommy will not react like this!!!

  3. I read also I geram!!! Similar thing happened to Bryan 2 weeks back. It ended up with me shoving a 7yr old girl aside – I didn’t care anymore by then!!! Thing is, we always teach our kids to take turns and share. But other kids don’t so they get bullied. At one point, I will teach my sons to be polite but assertive.

  4. when i read ur part about wanting to teach ryan to share… i can so relate to it… like so torn apart, like we want them to have a good manner, to share and all, but on the other hand, we want to be able to teach them to stand up for themselves and not get bullied… like stuck in between dunno which to go…

  5. alamak, what a mother like that ar?? maybe just a maid? despite a maid or mother, being an adult also cannot act like that la…terrible! poor ryan..

  6. So pity Ryan, can actually happily play just because of this spoilt kid, spoilt the fun and the parents really not knowing the manner, wondering how she going to teach her daughter the right manner. Spoilt adult have spoilt kid?

  7. ooo..i’m also boiling just reading your post. i’ve encountered this before but not japanese lah. so wanna smack the kid and the parents!!!! can’t blame the kid for behaving like that cos her mother doesn’t teach her manners.

  8. Poor Ryan! Supposed to enjoy the playground, end up crying. I tend to bring Lucas somewhere else to play if I’m in a situation like this…

    There could be many reasons:
    1. Both of them don’t understand English
    2. They’ve just arrived in Singapore?
    3. The mother just discovered the father is either having an affair or leaving her…

    Don’t stay mad ok? :)

  9. mommy so gutsy!! ahhaha.. hey, you did the right thing.. need to protect and teach your boy how to defend himself too right? hehe.. i cannot imagine yr face being angry though.. never seen you angry before..:)

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